How to deal with controlling personalities

Definition of controlling personality

The controlling personality is the personality that always has a love for controlling and issuing judgments, decisions and orders, as they are personalities with leadership and controlling tendencies, and they do not always care about the feelings of others, as they always issue judgments and decisions without looking at people’s condition or their feelings, not only but they interfere in matters that do not concern them It does not belong to them, as they are authoritarian personalities who blame others and criticize all actions that they did not supervise themselves. They also ignore the wishes of others, and do not allow others freedom of expression or choice.

Dealing with a controlling personality is very difficult, as they always make people feel angry and try to control people’s lives, behaviors, desires, and personal matters in every way, which causes others distress and sometimes psychological pain, so you must study how to deal with controlling personalities.

Characteristics of a bossy person

The bossy or controlling personality has many features that appear on it, as close people can easily identify the controlling personality, even strangers are enough for a few hours to know the nature of the controlling person, and the most important characteristics of the controlling personality:

• Always blaming others.
• They criticize all the actions around them.
• They make you feel guilty in any disagreement between you, even if you are right.
• They want to isolate the people around them, making them friendless, so that they can control them.
• Dramatic figures of the first order, in order to always turn the results in their favor.
• One of the characteristics of the controlling personality is the bloody fluctuation in mood.
• They are very controlling, observing, and observing all minor or major actions.
• They don't care about other people's feelings.
• They are always jealous of anyone close to them, whether partner or friend.
• They may behave badly to those around them, if they feel disobedient.
• They try to change people so that they can control them.
• They don't accept criticism.
• They always refuse advice.

How to deal with a controlling personality

The controlling personality is one of the most difficult personalities to deal with, as people feel upset and impatient about it, but often it is very difficult to abandon them or cut off relations with them because sometimes they are close, partners or relatives, so you must learn how to deal with them To avoid permanent conflict as a result of their control over the amounts, the points of dealing with them are:

• Not showing a direct reaction to their actions

The controlling person often waits for a reaction from the person in front of him, and he is usually not convinced of the reaction or the opposite point of view and cannot accept adverse reactions or criticism, as a result of his personality that loves control and control, so direct confrontation must be avoided, as fire cannot It is extinguished by the fire, so it must be steadfast and wait a little.

• Try to understand and empathize with them

Although sympathy for bad actions and controlling personalities is not desirable or justified, when looking at these people with a look of sympathy, it is noticed that they often suffer from a psychological or emotional problem that makes them lack control over their emotional relationships or they have a defect in upbringing, which leads them to try to control In any normal relationship in their lives, if they are looked at with sympathy, then justifications can be found to make the relationship kinder and softer.

• Don't get into an argument with them

The controlling personality has a love for power struggle, as they have great energy to engage in controversy and discussion even if they are wrong, they always fight and enter into struggles in order to prove that they are right and that they won in the end no matter what it costs them, so you should not enter into any argument with them Because the end is never in your favor.

• Control your anger

People should know that when they deal with the controlling person, they will get very angry, and they will suffer a lot from internal anger that may make them feel like exploding, but when feeling these feelings, they must think directly that they will lose the person in front of them forever, so self-control must be exercised and not show anger. In an inappropriate way, it is always advised to keep calm, restraint and think carefully before speaking. Calmness is the best solution when dealing with a controlling person.

• Don't give up your freedom

Sometimes the person in control has a great place in our lives or part of it, such as parents, husband, or one of the brothers, and always people must be respected, appreciated, and given love, but we must not give up our freedom, which is part of our human nature and evidence of normal personality, and we must also take into account Considering that the controlling personality always has a perfect way to infiltrate the minds of others and try to rob them of their freedom and fill their heads with their own ideas, beliefs, and things they want to implement, so you should never hang around with controlling personalities for a long time, nor should you remove personal boundaries with people.

• Know your rights well

A person cannot defend his rights if he does not know them, so every person must always know his rights in order to defend them, and then be clear about your rights and limits and know them to those around you, so that the controlling person knows what you will allow and what you will reject and not allow, in order to avoid the occurrence of No clash in the future.

• Set boundaries with controlling personalities

To avoid permanent conflict or feeling negative things, you should not deal with a lot of controlling or controlling personalities, by avoiding recurring family events if they cause more psychological pressure or problems, and you should also pay close attention that you should not let yourself be a victim of anyone’s control or control Never please anyone at the expense of yourself.

• Be assertive when necessary

The controlling personality often persists in its mistakes and in its control when people do not issue any reaction towards them, so at a certain time, firm and firm reactions must be issued that do not mean aggression as much as they mean wisdom and seriousness, so they stop at the limits of personal freedom, so it is not permissible for anyone to interfere in anyone’s life Too much or issuing orders and judgments all the time, so the controlling person must know how to deal with you and his duty to respect you and your privacy and not to understand your calmness and not to react to his previous actions in a wrong way, they are not negative, they are good actions for the survival of friendship only.

• Don't expect the controlling person to change

Sometimes the controlling person is a partner that we choose, so we should not make assumptions and expectations about his change, because most of the controlling personalities have a character that stems from within, as they cannot give up their control or control over the lives of others, so experts say that even if the person does his best, he cannot deal with The dominant personality all the time in harmony and love because they always practice their anger-oriented actions, so the difficulty of changing them and the inability to make them change their behavior must be realized.

• Move away if necessary

After trying to deal with the controlling person in all safe ways that maintain friendship and provide a state of comfort around this relationship, and preserve your dignity and personal freedom at the same time, if he does not stop his excessive control and cause a lot of psychological and health problems, you must stay away from everything that violates your privacy and disturbs your comfort. And it always makes you think negatively or aggressively.